| (Back to roadside. The Cop is still there checking the car. He finally
walks away. QC to Conservatory at the mansion. Froggo and Mills have arrived. Froggo
turned on the lights. They both look around. It obviously hasn't been used since Mr. Tesla
and Stalin was there.) Froggo: Oh yeah. Thanks for telling us. Mills: Meanie! (Sticks her tongue at...me?! What the?!) Froggo: Don't ask. (He leans on one of the walls, and to his and Mills' surprise, it swings open. He falls but then got up.) Froggo: Hey! What do you know? Mills: That King Kong vs. Godzilla is a bad movie! (Rimshot) Froggo: No, I mean I found a secret passage. Mills: Well, it isn't a secret anymore! (Laughing maniacally) Froggo: Well, let's see where it leads. Mills: Hey! I was going to suggest that! Meanie! (Sticks her tongue out at Froggo) (QC to Secret Passage between the Conservatory and the Lounge.) Froggo: Hey! We weren't supposed to know that yet! What a nut! (Note from JusSonic: You're not Loud.) Froggo: And you're not Pokejedservo; so there. (He and Mills continued down the secret passageway. They finally came out of the fireplace that you-know-who came out of earlier. They then look shocked at the now-dead Motorist's corpse) Mills: Oh my gosh! (Screaming maniacally) (Suddenly the fireplace close behind them. Mills freaks out and jumps around the place. Froggo managed to stop her, but screams like a maniac also. QC to attic. Molly and Loud heard Mills' yelling and left. QC to Lounge. Froggo and Mills tries to opened the door. It's still locked. They now started yelling. QC to second floor. Stalin (who left the bedroom when he heard Mills' screaming), Info (ditto), Loud, and Molly made for the staircase. However, they got there the same time and fell down.) Stalin: Watch it, you idiots! I will have you purged if I was allowed to! Loud: WHAT A GROUCH! Info: Don't mind him. (They all got back up and ran down the staircase. QC to Lounge. Mills and Froggo are still trying to open the Lounge. No luck. Back to Hall.) Stalin: Where is that screaming coming from? Loud: HOW SHOULD I KNOW? Stalin: You heard it too! (Then, Karaoke and Smartypants ran out of the cellar they were in.) Info: Where are they?! Stalin: The Lounge! Loud: WHY DID YOU ASK ME THEN? (Rimshot) Stalin: Shut up! (He tries to open the door. It's still locked.) Smartypants: The door is locked! Loud: NO KIDDING, SMARTYPANTS! Smartypants: Quick! Unlock it! Loud: STALIN, WHERE IS THE KEY?! (Stalin checks his pockets and realizes...) Stalin: The key is gone! (Loud then tries to bang on the door) Loud: LET US IN! LET US IN! (QC to Lounge) Froggo/Mills: Let us out! Let us out! (QC to Hall) Stalin: Out of the way! I will try to break it down! (He goes to the Study door and ran to the Lounge door. He fells, clutching his shoulder) Molly: Wait! I got an idea! Loud: FIRST TIME! Molly: Oh shut up. (She ran to the Study. QC to Study. Molly grabs the Revolver from the cupboard that is opened. She ran out. QC to Hall. She ran out and almost tripped over Stalin. The Revolver went off and hits the chandelier. Everyone else ran for it. QC to Lounge. Froggo and Mills crouched down.) Froggo: They are shooting at us! Mills: (screaming insanely) (QC to Hall. Molly aims for the Lounge door and shoots the Revolver. She fires twice and both shots hit the door's lock. QC to Lounge.) Froggo: Aaah! Mills: What?! You been shot?! Froggo: No! I just have a bad daydream! (Rimshot) (QC to Hall) Molly: You can come out! The door is opened! (She lowers the gun, unknown she is pointing it at Loud and Smartypants. They ran out of the way. The Lounge door opened and Froggo and Mills come out very annoyed.) Froggo: Why are you shooting at us?! Molly: I was trying to get you out! Froggo: Grr! You could have killed us! I could have been killed! I can't take over more suspense! (Just then, the chandelier fell from the earlier shot. Luckily it missed. Froggo, freaking out, fell into a chair nearby.) Mills: Never mind that! Look! (They ran to the Lounge. They looked shocked at the now dead Motorist. Note: From now on, I am not saying QC throughout this story. Unless I decided to.) Karaoke: Which one of you did this? Mills: We found him like this! Info: How did you all get in? Loud: YEAH! THE DOOR WAS LOCKED! Mills: There's a secret passage from the Conservatory! Smartypants: Wait a minute...isn't that the gun from the Study? Molly: Yes! Karaoke: But it was locked! Molly: Not anymore! It's unlocked! Loud, Smartypants, and Stalin (who has now gotten back up): Unlock?! Molly: Yes! I will show up! (They ran to the Study. As they do so, Molly thrown the gun into the now-broken chandelier.) (Back to the Study. Everyone had gotten there and look shocked at the cupboard that is now open.) Karaoke: (suspiciously) How on earth did you know it was unlocked? Did you do it and got the gun? Molly: No! I think I should try to break it open but to my surprise, it was opened already! Karaoke: Yeah right! (Then the doorbell rang. The guests stop in shock; they didn't do anything at first.) Mills: Maybe if we were lucky, they will go away. (However, the doorbell kept ringing) Loud: FORGET IT! I AM GOING TO OPEN IT! Mills: Are you crazy?! Loud: NO! I GOT NOTHING TO HIDE! I DIDN'T DO IT! (To Stalin) GIVE ME THE STINKING KEY! Stalin: Fine. (Stalin, with a sigh, gives the key to Loud) Loud: THANKS! (He left the Study, with everyone else following him. The Hall. He opens the door. The Cop is there.) The Cop: Good evening, sir. (The door closes on his face. Then it opens up to reveal an embarrass Loud and a bunch of nervous guests.) Loud: UH, HELLO? Cop: Yes, I found a car that is abandoned somewhere on the road. Did the driver come by for help by any chance? Everyone (but Loud): No, no, no! Loud: WELL, YES. Cop: Err is there any disagreement here? Everyone (but Loud): No! Loud: YES! (The Cop looks suspiciously and then shook it off) Cop: Right, can I use your phone? (Stalin steps in front of Loud) Loud: HEY! Stalin: Why of course you may. What for? Cop: Don't know. The script told me to do so. Stalin: Well, perhaps you can, uh, err, well... Froggo: Use one in the Library! Stalin: Yes, of course! You can use the one in the Library. Cop: (confused) Ok... (The Cop comes in. Stalin closes the door. The Cop then looks suspiciously at Molly.) Cop: Do I know you from someplace? Molly: If you know other girls from Washington, your guess is good as mine! Cop: Never mind. Thought I known you. (He then notices the chandelier) Cop: What on earth happened here?! Stalin: Err the chandelier fell. No one was hurt...or killed for that matter. Karaoke: (mumbles to self) For your sake, it better not be you. Cop: What? Karaoke: (quickly) Nothing! Stalin: Follow me, sir. (The Cop begins to do so. Mills and Smartypants quickly close the doors to the Study and Lounge so the Cop wouldn't look in. The Cop look confused.) Stalin: Err will you like to make your call now? Cop: (suspiciously) Ok... (Library. Stalin and The Cop are there. Stalin nodded to the phone.) Stalin: Go ahead and make your phone call. Cop: Thanks. Stalin: (remembers) Oh, and help yourself to some soda if you like. Cop: Thanks again. (The Cop reaches for a drink.) Stalin: Not the one from Russia. Just in case. Cop: (confused) Just in case of what? (But Stalin closes the door. Back to Hall. Stalin locks the door and turned to the now-shocked guests.) Stalin: What to do now? (Back to Library. The Cop tries to open the door but couldn't. He looked frustrated. Back to Hall.) Loud: SHOULDN'T WE TELL HIM??? Info: What? And let him arrested us without finding out whom did it? No way! Stalin: Let clean this up before you-know-who arrives. Loud: YOU MEAN THE POLICE? Everyone else: Shut up! (Back to Library. The Cop was about to pick up the phone when it started ringing. He looks confused and picked it up.) Cop: Hello? (Hall. Everyone heard the Cop answering the phone. They didn't move.) Stalin: Did the cop answer it? Mills: Maybe he did! (Screaming insanely) (Back to Library. The Cop, surprisingly, didn't hear Mills scream.) Cop: Who may I asked is this? (Pauses) Uh, hold on please. (He put the phone down a minute and walks over to the door. He begins pounding on it.) Cop: Let me out of here! Let me out of here, you have no right to shut me in! I'll book you for false arrest, and wrongful imprisonment, and obstructing an officer in the course of his duty! And murder! (The door quickly opens. Stalin and the others look at the Cop in fear.) Stalin: What...what do you mean? Cop: I only say that so you can let me out. (The others laugh nervously) Cop: What on earth is going on here? Why did you lock me up? And why are you getting a call from J. Edgar Hoover? Stalin: Who? Cop: Don't you know? He is the head of the FBI! Froggo: Why would he call you, Stalin? Stalin: I don't know! He calls everyone else, why shouldn't he call me? Smartypants: Uh... Stalin: Don't answer. (Rimshot) Stalin: Now if you excuse me... Loud: WHY? DID YOU FART? (Rimshot) (Stalin looks annoyed, but went into the Library, closes the door and locked it. The Cop looks confused) Cop: What is going on here? Mills: Err, we, uh, (thinks of something) having a party! (Laughing insanely) Cop: Darn, girl! Calm down! Mills: Hey! I'm always like this! Right, guys? Everyone else: Hi, Mills! Cop: Can I look around? Mills: Why yes! Why don't you show him around, Loud? Loud: WHY ME? Mills: You can show him the Dining Room...or the Kitchen...or the Ball Room! Loud: OH ALL RIGHT! (To Cop) I CAN SHOW YOU THE DINING ROOM...OR THE KITCHEN...OR THE BALL ROOM. WALK THIS WAY. Cop: Can't. I will get a foot rash. (Rimshot) Loud: JUST FOLLOW ME! (Die-I mean, the Dining Room. The Cop opens that window thingy and looks inside the Kitchen. He looks suspiciously. Lounge.) Mills: Make it so the cop wouldn't be more suspicious! Smartypants: Uh, ok. (Dining Room) Loud: THIS HERE IS THE DIE-I MEAN DINING ROOM! Cop: I heard that joke before so knock it off! Loud: KNOCK WHAT OFF? A VASE? (Rimshot) (Lounge.) Mills: Hurry up! Smartypants: I am trying to! (Dining Room. The Cop looks in the Hall suspiciously.) Cop: What is going on in those two rooms? Loud: ERR, WHAT TWO ROOMS? (But the Cop goes for the door. Loud follows after him. Hall. The guests ran for the Study. They got there just in time when the Cop and Mr. Loud got there.) Cop: (pointing to both the Lounge and Study) Those two rooms. Loud: WELL, YOU SEE... (The Cop decides to find out for himself and heads for the Study door. Loud go to the door and tries to stop him.) Loud: OFFICER, YOU CAN'T GO IN THERE! Cop: And why not? Loud: BECAUSE...IT IS ALL TOO UGLY! Cop: Yeah right! (He pushed Loud aside and goes inside the Study) Loud: WHAT A GROUCH! (He follows after him. Study. Music can be heard in there. It's some Life song (can't remember what is it). Mrs. Info is the couch on top of the dead Mr. Tesla, using his arm to pretend to...uh give him the tongue.) Info: (thought) Gross! (The Cop sees Col. Froggo and some woman kissing near a curtain. In reality, however, Mrs. Karaoke is in the curtains using the Cook's body to disguise herself while using her own hands on Froggo. She looks disgusted.) Karaoke: (thought) I am writing a note of complaint to myself! Cop: You called this ugly? Looks like people having "fun" to me. Loud: ERR, I GUESS. (Both of them left for the Lounge. Loud closes the door behind him. Lounge. Mills pours a beer (I will allow it this time!) in the dead Motorist's drink. The body is in a chair, with a hat covering the fatal wound. Music is still heard, but faintly.) Mills: No kidding! (Note from JusSonic: Will you all stop that?!) Mills: Sorry! (Laughing insanely) (Study. Froggo and Karaoke put the Cook's body back on the couch. Karaoke still looks disgusted.) Karaoke: That is the last time I agreed to do this! Froggo: At least it fools the Cop. Info: Says you! You didn't pretend to kiss an old dead fool! (Lounge. Before the Cop and Loud arrives, Smartypants convinces Mills to pretend to kiss him. She decided she has no choice but to do so. Note from JusSonic: Boy Toast is going to be peeved. *Snickers*) Mills: Hey! Meanie! (Sticks tongue at me again. How did they do that???) (She pretends to kiss Smartypants. Note: I don't know how Miss Information manages to do that! The Cop and Loud got there.) Cop: Uh, excuse me? (The two "lovers" stopped and looked at the Cop) Smartypants: Why? Did you burp? (Rimshot) (The Cop notices the dead (He doesn't know that) Motorist in the chair and sniffs him. He frowns.) Cop: This guy is drunk, dead drunk. Mills: (nervously) Dead right. Smartypants: (quickly) Alive yes! (Rimshot) Cop: Okay...(To dead Motorist) you aren't planning to drive home are you? Smartypants: Oh, we will make sure he won't drive home. I will promise you that! Mills: Right! (Laughing maniacally) Cop: (concerned) Someone will give him a ride home right? Mills: Oh...someone will give a ride in a car. Smartypants: (mumbles to self) A long black one. Mills: (quickly) A limo! Cop: (confused) Ok... (He and Loud left the room. Mills and Smartypants look relieved.) (Hall. Stalin has just left the Library. He leans against the door and looks relieved for a moment. That moment, however, is now gone when he sees the Cop and Loud leaving the Lounge. He smiles nervously and goes over to them.) Stalin: Err, officer, did you happened to see...? Cop: Don't bother. I had seen enough. Stalin: Officer, I should explained... Cop: There isn't anything wrong here. Stalin: What?! Cop: Certainly. There is nothing in the law book saying you can't have a good party. Stalin: Ah. (Looks at Loud who nods at him) Cop: Now if I can make my call... Stalin: Certainly. Just head back to the Library. Cop: Why? Stalin: Maybe you might like to read after you make your call. Cop: (confused) Ok... (He heads back to the Library. Stalin closes the door...and locked him in again. The guests came back into the Hall.) Loud: WHY DID YOU LOCK IN HIM AGAIN? Stalin: Look, we can't be that relieved. We still haven't solved this mystery yet. Smartypants: We only have a few minutes before the cops arrived. Loud: BUT THEY ALREADY DID! Everyone else: Shut up! Stalin: Back to searching the mansion, people. Loud: WHAT A BUNCH OF GROUCHES! (The guests continued to what they was doing before the Motorist was found dead. Kitchen. Froggo and Mills had arrived. Hint, hint.) Froggo: Stop that. (Note from JusSonic: Well, excuse me!) Mills: Why? Did you fart? (Rimshot) (Froggo opens another door that is there...only to get hit on the head with an ironing board.) Froggo: Ow! (Mills looks in the freezer. She continues doing it until her hand grabs onto one of the meat hooks. To her surprise and ours, it turns and a door appears.) Mills: Way cool! Another secret passage! (Laughing maniacally) Froggo: Let see where this goes. (They went into the secret passage. Study. The music is still on, by the way. Froggo and Mills came out of a painting that is turned around. They look surprised at where they are.) Mills: Well, at least we found out where this passage goes to. Froggo: Let's go the Ball Room. Mills: But we already checked there! Froggo: Let's check again. (Attic. Loud and Molly is looking around up there. Near the cellar steps. A gloved hand pulls some sort of switch. All the lights are turned off in the mansion and the music is stopped. Note: Thanks goodness, that music is annoying! Cellar. Karaoke, looking confused, backs into the boiler without looking. She turns around alarmed and angrily hits it.) Karaoke: You leave your hands in your pants, Smartypants! Smartypants: Uh, I am over here. Karaoke: Oh sorry. (Bedroom. Stalin looks around surprised.) Stalin: What on earth...?! I will purge someone for this! (Another bedroom. Info screams. Staircase. Molly has left Loud and went down the stairs. We still heard Info's screams. Library. The Cop is still on the phone.) Cop: Hello? Hello? Did I forget to dial Collect again? (Billiard Room. Molly had entered quietly. We heard a voice, though we can't identify it at first.) Voice: Shut the door. Molly: I did. Voice: Ok. Did anyone see you? Molly: Not really. The mansion is still in the dark. Voice: That's because I am responsible for it. Molly: What?! Who are...?! (She gets closer but before she could finish, a Rope is now around her neck!) Molly: (gasping) Oh my gosh! It's you! (Library. The Cop is still there, confused.) Cop: Is...is someone there? If so, then I believed that I am in danger. (He didn't notice, however, that the door to the Library is being opened. Cop: Okay, I admit that I am not on duty. But believe me, I am in danger. Do you know that Soviet-looking house... (However, he then was cut off as a hand holding the Lead Pipe comes down softly on the phone cradle.) Cop: Hello? Hello? (He also didn't notice that a Lead Pipe is behind him. Then we see the Lead Pipe is about to...however we go to a bell ringing. We rapidly cut to each guests' looking surprised. Stalin, on the other hand...Hall. The door has just open. A girl that looks like Cho-Cho is outside wearing some sort of telegram uniform.) Singing Telegram Girl: (singing) I . . . am . . . your singing telegram-- (However, she is cut off as a gun was fired and she fell...never to sing again. The door slams. Attic. Loud opens a closet door and a bunch of stuff fell on him. Another Bedroom. A Jerk-in-the-box opens, scaring the wits out of Mrs. Info, who screams. First Bedroom. Stalin is still in it, still lost in the dark.) Stalin: (angrily) Oh shut up. (He, however, hears Info's screams and tries to find the door.) Stalin: I'm coming. (He found another part of the bedroom and opened it. He goes through it.) Stalin: Hold on! (He grasps another handle.) Stalin: What the...another door? (He twists it. The shower then turns off. He realizes, the idiot, that he is in the shower. Note: Ha ha ha!) Stalin: (angrily) This isn't funny! (Staircase. A now wet Stalin ran down the stairs and looks for the switch to the lights. He found it and everything get turns on again. The annoying music begins again. Everyone (except Molly who is now dead) returns to the Hall. The music ends.) Loud: THANKS GOODNESS! THAT MUSIC IS ANNOYING! Smartypants: That is the best I can do! Stalin: Wait...where is Molly? Info: Wasn't she with you Loud? Loud: I THOUGHT SHE LEFT FOR THE BATHROOM! Karaoke: Where is she anyway? (They first check the Billiard Room. They were shocked to see that Molly is on the pool table, dead because she has a Rope hanged around her neck.) Loud: HEY MOLLY! THIS ISN'T THE BATHROOM! Mills: She is dead! Loud: OH! NEVER MIND! (They check the Library next. They were now shocked at the Cop now dead on a table. They looked confused.) Loud: NOW THERE IS TWO MURDERS! (Smartypants goes over to Cop and found the Lead Pipe.) Smartypants: He is hit over the head with this, which means none of them were shot. Info: I thought I heard a gun shot. Karaoke: So did I. Mills: Wait! I think I heard the door slam! Froggo: Oh great. The murderer must have run out. (They ran to the door. Hall. They opened the door and are shocked to see the now dead Telegram Girl on the porch.) Stalin: (gasps) Three murders... Smartypants: Well, we now know who got shot. (They close the door. Stalin inspects the floor.) Stalin: The Revolver is missing. Molly has left it here. Loud: GREAT! NOW THERE IS SIX MURDERS TO SOLVE! Stalin: Well here is something else that is great. I have solved the murder. Guests: You did??? Stalin: Yes. I will also tell you how it was all done. Follow me. (Library. Stalin had arrived there, as well as the other guests. Note: From now on, I will tell you guys where they are going to, so I will stop saying the room.) Stalin: In order to get through this, I should explained tonight's events from the beginning to now. When the evening began, Molly is here waiting to offer you guests soda. I was in the Hall. (Pauses) I know because I was there. Then I head to the Kitchen. (Everyone heads for the Kitchen.) Stalin: And the Cook was here, alive. She was making dinner! Mills: No wonder it was awful! (Laughing insanely) (Rimshot) (They ran for the Hall.) Stalin: And the doorbell rang! (Dings) And it was you! (Points to Froggo) Froggo: Yes... Stalin: And I took your coat and I recognized you as Colonel Froggo and that you should go by that name! And you did the butt joke! Froggo: (snickering) Oh yeah. That is still good. Stalin: I introduced you to me as the butler... Loud: I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE BUTLER! (Rimshot) Stalin: Quiet! Then I led you to the Library! (They ran to the Library) Stalin: Molly met you...and smiles...(smiles)...and gave you some soda! (They ran to the Hall again) Stalin: And the next guest is Mrs. Info, all pale and misinform. I took her coat and led her to the Library! (They ran to the Library again) Stalin: I introduced her to Colonel Froggo. Hello, hello. However, I noticed that Info and Molly didn't like each other. Info: No kidding, ya all! Stalin: Anyway, there was a roll of thunder and a crash of lightning! Boom! And then to make long story short... Guests: Too late. Stalin: (ignoring them)...you have all arrived! (They ran for the Hall again, this time to the gong. Stalin grabs that malley thingy.) Stalin: The cook struck the gong saying that dinner is ready! (struck the gong) And we all go to the Dining Room! (They ran for the Dining Room now. Stalin shows where the guests were sitting.) Stalin: Mrs. Karaoke sat here, Prof. Smartypants sat here, Mrs. Info sat here, Mr. Loud, Col. Froggo, and Ms. Mills sat here, there, and there! This seat (nods to head chair) was taken by you know who! Guests: Mr. Tesla. Stalin: Actually! Froggo: What's next, Uncle Joe? Stalin: Don't call me that! Anyway, we all revealed that we each had a letter. (Points to chairs) And you had a letter, you had a letter, you have a letter... All: Will you hurried up?! Stalin: Oh right, oh right! The subject of this matter is...blackmail! Loud: BUT ALL THIS CONTINUED IN THE STUDY! Stalin: Of course! (They ran to the Study. Stalin then points to where the guests were earlier.) Stalin: Mr. Loud stood here, and Mrs. Karaoke here, and Ms. Mills here, Prof. Smartypants. Col. Froggo, Mrs. Info... Guests: Get going!!! Stalin: I am, I am! Mr. Tesla got his bags from the Hall, you opened your packages, (closes the door) and Mr. Tesla switch off the lights! (He does so. We hear some screams. The lights turn back on. Stalin is on the floor. The guests look shocked at first. Then...) Stalin: (opening his eyes) Mr. Tesla is on the floor, apparently dead. Smartypants: He was dead!!! I examined him, remember?! Stalin: Then may I ask why is he found later in the bathroom with a fatal wound on the head by the Candlestick if he was already dead?! Smartypants: Oh right! I made a mistake! (Sat down) Even doctors are known to make that mistake at time to time! Stalin: Maybe. But let ask ourselves this. If he was pretending to be dead, why do so? Because he realizes his scheme has failed and someone was intent to shoot him, not me! The bullet (points to Tesla's ear) just hits his ear and into the wall. So he decided to pretend he was dead in order to avoided being killed again. Smartypants: Oh I get it. Someone who "tries" to grab the gun from me was planning to shoot him. Stalin: Let's not forget what happened next! Mrs. Karaoke took a drink from the soda, you (points to Smartypants) said "Maybe he was poisoned!" She screams. (pretends to scream like a sick lady. He pushes Mrs. Karaoke who started screaming again. He sat her on the couch) Mr. Loud...(slaps Karaoke who stopped screaming.)..."WELL I WAS TRYING TO STOP HER SCREAMING!" Then more screaming, it was from Molly in the Billiard Room! We all go there! (They ran to the Billiard Room now. Stalin sat on the pool table.) Stalin: But one of us wasn't here. (Deeply) No. Others: No? Stalin: No. Obviously at this moment, one of us has left to kill the Cook. May I ask who wasn't here when we were talking to Molly? (The guests didn't answer. Finally...) Loud: DID YOU KNOW? Stalin: Of course; while we were here, trying to calm Molly, one of us stay in the Study... (He ran for the Study) Stalin:...picks up the Knife (does so and go to Hall.) Stalin:...ran down the Hall.... (He and the guests went to the Kitchen.) Stalin: And stab the Cook! (He stabs a chicken that is hanging on the freezer door.) Karaoke: May I ask why even do it? We could have seen him! Stalin: Not if he or she uses this secret passage which leads to the Study! (Activates the secret passage Mills and Froggo found earlier) And he uses the passageway and got to the Study before we do. (They now ran to the Study) Mills: And then?! Stalin: He comes out! (Open the passageway) Loud: HUH? Froggo: How did you...? Stalin: A friend of mine once owns this mansion. I knew everything about it. Kararoke: I knew it! You are the murderer! Stalin: Don't be stupid, madam. Froggo: Too late. (Rimshot) Stalin: Behave. Anyway, even if I did do it, why would I have shown you? Smartypants: Uh, who also knew about the passageway? Mills: I did. Froggo and me found it. (Laughing insanely) Froggo: You are the one who found it! You could have known all the time! Mills: Meanie! (Sticks tongue out at Froggo) Karaoke: Why should we believe you? Stalin: Because she was with us in the Billiard Room when Molly was screaming. Info: Were you paying attention? Stalin: I refused to pay anyone! (Rimshot) Karaoke: Forget it. Wait a second...why was the Cook murdered?! She had nothing to do with Tesla! Stalin: Of course she is! I had invited you all to exposed Tesla! But didn't you all know that the others were involved too? (Dum, dum, dum as the guests gasp.) Loud: WHAT? Stalin: The Cook and Molly. Info: You mean... Stalin: Yes. In order for Tesla to work out his blackmailing scheme, he must find out about them. The Cook and Molly were his henchmen! Froggo: Does this mean, if someone knew that the Cook was involved in all this, he or she...kill her? Stalin: Yes. I know because I was once *Tesla's* butler. And the Cook did work for one of you? Loud: BUT WHO? (Stalin ignored him and turns to Mrs. Info) Stalin: You knew Molly, didn't you?! Info: What are you all talking about?! I don't know her! Stalin: Ha! You are denying it! Info: Hmph. All right, fine. I know Molly. My husband cheated on me with her. I hated her because of that. But I wasn't that jealous. Stalin: Anyone else knew her? Mills: I do! She used to work for me at that hotel I told you about earlier! (laugh maniacally) Stalin: Which explains that Froggo also knew her. He, as we already found out, is one of Mills' clients. (To Froggo) That's why you wanted to get your hands on those pictures. They show you and Molly doing something "offensive". Froggo: (angrily) Tesla threatened to mail those pictures to my mom! She would have died from the shock! (Pauses) And maybe from a heart attack. Info: Didn't you say she is dead? Froggo: Err, uh... Info: So you have a motive. Stalin: So does everyone else, if case you had forgotten. Info: What? Stalin: My point preciously. Froggo: Ok, wise guy. Perhaps you should tell us when Tesla was killed. Stalin: I'll get to that. (Grabs Loud) Mr. Tesla was still in the Study (throwing Loud to ground) pretending to be dead when we came back. But one of us knows he is still alive. I explained who was I and that I invited you. Then we all realized there was someone else in the house. All: The Cook! (Everyone ran for the Kitchen. When they arrived, Loud went to the freezer like earlier. He then realized...) Loud: HEY! WHERE'S STALIN?! (The freezer opens. Mills scream again. Stalin fell into Loud's arms. Loud looks annoyed now and dropped him. Take a guess.) Stalin: When we discovered she is now dead, one of us, when we aren't looking, took the passage to the Study. Karaoke: What? Again? Stalin: Yes! (They ran back to the Study. There, Stalin shows how Tesla's murder had happened.) Stalin: The murderer was in the passage at this time. Meanwhile, Mr. Tesla (throws Loud to floor again. Loud is starting get peeved) got up from the floor. (Grabs Loud and throw him to the floor again.) Unfortunately, the murderer got out of the passage and noticed him. He grabs the Candlestick. (Pretends to hold one and chases after Loud who ran of the Study. Everyone else did as well.) Mr. Tesla ran out of the Study trying to escape. However, the murderer sneak behind him and then...whack! (Hits Loud over head. Loud is now angry) Loud: STOP THAT! Stalin: No. (grabs Loud and pull him to the bathroom.) And then the murderer threw him in the toilet! (Throws Loud into the bathroom and closes the door. He pretends to be looking at a watch.) And then, he rejoins us in the Kitchen and we never even noticed! Froggo: (impatiently) Well, who is it?! Stalin: It's simple. The murderer! Come on! (He ran off. Loud came of the bathroom, wet and still angry. Everyone proceed to the Study.) Stalin: We put all the weapons in the cupboard, I locked it, and we go to the front door so I can throw it away! (He ran out, almost knocking down the guests. QC to front door. Note: I'm tiring of confusing myself here!) Froggo: No kidding! (Note from JusSonic: Stop that!) Froggo: Sorry. Stalin: And I was going to throw it away...(opens door, pretending to do so) when the Motorist arrived! However, I didn't really threw the key away. Someone took the key and made a copy of it. That what I threw away, not the real key! Smartypants: Of course, one of us got the real key when you were distracted! Stalin: Yes. (closes door. Loud realizes something...) Loud: HEY, WAIT A SECOND! FROGGO HAS A GOVERNMENT JOB, INFO'S HUSBAND IS A STINKING SCIENTIST, AND...(Ran to Billiard Room door and point in) MOLLY IS A LINK BETWEEN THEM! Smartypants: Ok, what is his job? Stalin: I will tell you. He is working on...(deep voice) the next fusion bomb. (Dum, dum, dum time) Karaoke: We are going to get letter. Froggo: (sarciously) Geez, thanks for spoiling it, Stalin. Stalin: Your welcome. Froggo: That wasn't a thank you! Info: It isn't? Froggo: And besides, how did you know that? Stalin: (smiling) Can you keep a secret? Froggo: Yes... Stalin: So can I. (Rimshot) Karaoke: Is anyone else involved, or Froggo did it alone? Info: When did JFK have anything to do with this? Loud: HEY! THAT EVENT DIDN'T HAPPENED YET! Info: Oops, sorry. Mills: What event? Loud: FORGET IT, WILLYA?! Mills: Forget what? Stalin: Enough! Let's get to the other murders! Smartypants: Yep. Uh, it's bad luck that the Motorist arrived at a bad place and time. (Stalin chuckled) Stalin: "Luck"? There is no such thing as "luck" here. I invited him. Guests: What?! Stalin: Of course; in case you hadn't noticed, everyone who were here or was here was either Tesla's victim or his henchman. Anyone who died gave him info about you. Info: That's sick! I didn't do anything with him! Mills: Yuckosis! Loud: HE MEANS INFORMATION, GIRLS. Mills: Like I said, Yuckosis! (Rimshot) Stalin: (with a frown) I invited him and everyone else to give evidence against Tesla. That way, we will get him to confess. Mills: Oh really? What did he have in common with Tesla? Who did he work for? (Froggo sighs) Froggo: He was my driver during the war. (He sat down, sadly) Stalin: Oh? And what did the Motorist know about you? Froggo: He knew I was a war profiteer. Loud: HUH? Karaoke: It means he benefits from the war. But I don't know how that can be bad. Froggo: Well, you see. I stole some Air Force planes stuff and sold them in the Black Market. That is how I become rich. But I wouldn't kill because of that! Karaoke: (annoyed) No wonder some of our best men died! Because their planes couldn't worked! Let me case, the Cop worked for Tesla too? Mills: Yes and let me explained. That Cop is from Washington. I sorta bribed him once a month so he wouldn't shut me down. Unfortunately, guess who found out somewhat. Karaoke: That's disgusting...and wrong. Mills: Says you! (Sticks her tongue out at Karaoke.) Info: Well that settled. Loud: NO IT ISN'T! WHAT ABOUT THAT TELEGRAM GIRL?! (Everyone open the front door. Smartypants was the first there. He looks down and sighs. The rain has stopped, by the way.) Smartypants: She...she was my patient once. I lost my license because of what I did to her. Tesla found out and blackmailed me. (Pauses) Stalin: Well...let put her in the Study with the other corpses. Info: Who? JFK? Everyone else: Stop that! Info: What a nut. Loud: HEY, THAT'S MY LINE! (QC to Study. Everyone dropped the dead girl on the floor.) Stalin: Well, now we all know why they died and whom they are connected to. Since whoever wanted Tesla dead, they also want his informers dead as well. Smartypants: Hold on! Froggo: To what? Smartypants: I mean, how did the murderer know about everything? The girl might have told Tesla about me...but I didn't anyone until now. Stalin: Let's continued to our explanation of tonight's events. Loud: HEY! QUIT CHANGING THE SUBJECT! Stalin: I am not! Anyway, there is only way for the murderer to his or her hands on the weapons. He and/or she took the key from my pockets. We then took Froggo's suggestion to search the mansion. Karaoke: Hey yeah! It's your suggestion, so it is your fault! Froggo: Oh sure. Blame me what don't ya? Stalin: No one is. Anyway, somehow the murderer left his or her partner and went to the Study. On the desk is the evidence we needed to reveal Tesla. Info: Don't ya all mean exposed? Stalin: Yes, but I don't want to make Mrs. Karaoke mad. Karaoke: You got that right. Mills: Where is it now? Stalin: Gone. The murderer must have destroyed them in the fire. Loud: WHAT A NUT! Mills: Gypola. Froggo: Bad. (Everyone stare at him) Froggo: I don't have a catch phase, all right?! Loud: LIKE I SAID, WHAT A NUT! Stalin: Enough! Anyway, after finding out the rest of the story, he or she unlocked the cupboard with the key he stole from me, took the Wrench... Mills: Then me and Froggo found the secret passage to the Lounge, where we found the Motorist dead! (Laughs maniacally) Stalin: Yes (everyone ran into the Hall where Stalin reenact the next scene) and when we heard Mills and Froggo' screaming, we went downstairs in a hurry! Molly ran to the cupboard, grab the gun, and shot the door in order to open it! Bang! And then, all of the sudden...the doorbell rang! (Suddenly, without warning, it did. Everyone look shocked) Karaoke: Darn it! If it's another informer, they got to leave right now or they will be dead! (She ran to the front door and opens it. It is some sort of bible guy who looks like Father Time. He is holding some sort of Revelation book.) Bible guy: Good evening. Are you are interesting into getting into Heaven? Guests: Huh? BG: Repent. Heaven is at hand here. Mills: No kidding! (Screaming maniacally) BG: The end is upon us! Smartypants: Too late for that! Karaoke: Go away! BG: But your souls are in terrible danger! Karaoke: So is our lives, you crazy old coot! (She slams the door on his face. Everyone turn back to Stalin.) Loud: WHAT NEXT? Stalin: That Cop arrived next. I locked him in the Library in an attempt to keep him from getting suspicious. We split up again. But the murderer left his partner again...and turned off the lights! (He went to switchboard and did so. The lights are now off. Everyone scream and moaned.) Loud: WHAT THE HECK?! (Info is heard squealing.) Karaoke: Oh great. Not again. Mills: (annoyed) Turn on the lights! (Screaming maniacally) (Note from JusSonic: Okay, right after the lights turned off, I will show three different endings. This is one of the possible endings.) (Stalin turned the lights back on.) Stalin: Sorry about that! Didn't mean to scare anyone! Loud: TOO LATE FOR APOLOGIES! WHAT A NUT! Info: (squealing a bit) Stalin: After the lights turned on, we discovered three more murders. Info: So who all killed them? Stalin: Well, what I know, none of you killed Mr. Tesla or the Cook. Loud: WHO DID? Info: Yes. Stalin: Who wasn't with us? (Everyone begin pointing to at each other.) Stalin: That person is...Molly. Guests: Molly?! Stalin: She was listening to us from the recorder in the Billiard Room. (QC to a flashback with Molly in the Billiard Room. Stalin provided the voice-over, describing the events as follow) When the gun went off, she thought Tesla was dead. While we were looking at the bullet hole in the wall, she sneak into the Study, grab the Knife, and ran to the Kitchen, and killed the Cook. (We see Molly killing the Cook with the Knife.) The reason we didn't hear the cook screamed is because Karaoke was screaming of the so-called poisoned soda. Karaoke: (V/O) Oh sure. Blame me what don't you? Stalin: (V/O) Don't interrupt me! Anyway, after she did the deed, she returned to the Billiard Room, locked herself in, and screamed. We ran to see what is the matter. (QC back to present Hall) Froggo: Okay, that explains it. But when did Molly killed Tesla? Stalin: I will explain that. While we ran to the Kitchen to check on the Cook, Molly stay in the Study to make sure Tesla is dead. (QC to flashback of Molly hiding behind a chair in the Study. Stalin described the events in voice-over again) She noticed he gotten up and also noticed he is trying to escaped. So she killed him with the Candlestick and threw him into the toilet. (QC back to present Hall) Mills: Why she did do it?! I mean she must have a motive! (Laughing manically) Loud: WELL, DUH! Stalin: She did it to confuse us! Karaoke: Too late. (Rimshot) (Froggo nods) Smartypants: Uh, why did she really do it? Stalin: The real question here is...did she do it alone or was she under someone's orders? She took her orders from the person who later killed her in order to silent her. Guests: Who??? Stalin: (turns to Froggo) Was it one of her clients? (Turns to Info) Or a jealous wife? (Turns to Smartypants) Or a pervert doctor? (Smartypants looks peeved but Stalin ignored it. Finally....) No, it was her former employer...Ms. Mills! (Dum, dum, dum) Mills: That is a lie! Stalin: Oh really? You always use her since the beginning. While we aren't looking, you left Froggo while we were searching the mansion to kill the Motorist! Mills: That is crazy! I mean, how should I have known about that secret passage?! Stalin: Simple. Molly told you. So when we split up again... (QC to Mills, wearing black gloves, turning off the lights. Guess who provided the voice-over, explaining the events again) you turned off all the lights in the mansion. Since it is easy on the ground floor, no one suspected you. You got the Lead Pipe and the Rope from the cupboard, strangle Molly in the Billiard Room, go to the Library, hit the Cop over the head with the Lead Pipe, heard the door bell rang, grab the Revolver from where Molly dropped it, open the door, recognized the girl from her photos, and shot her. (QC to present Hall. Mills looked peeved.) Mills: You have no proof I did it! Stalin: Well, looks like I may have to get some. Everyone, in case you forgotten the gun is still missing. Boys, empty out your pockets and girls, empty out your purses. Whoever has the gun is the murderer. (Everyone did so. However, Mills got out the Revolver and point it at everyone.) Mills: Well, well Stalin. For a communist, I am impressed. (Stalin ignored her "praise". Mills slowly go to the front door while pointing the Revolver at the others.) Froggo: Hey! I am impressed too! Mills: Shut up shorty! Froggo: What a grouch! Loud: THAT IS MY LINE! Froggo: Sorry. Loud: ANYWAY, I DON'T GET ONE THING! Smartypants: That is...? Loud: WHY EVEN DO IT? HALF OF WASHINGTON... Info: The president is involved? (Rimshot) Loud: I MEAN HALF OF THE CITY KNOWS WHAT BUSINESS SHE IS RUNNING! SHE IS IN NO DANGER! Mills: Maybe, if that is my real business. Loud: HUH? Mills: (screaming maniacally) My business is...secrets. Thanks to Molly, I know everything. Senator Karaoke's defense stuff, Froggo's fusion bomb, Smartypants's UN contracts, and the work of Mrs. Info's husband. (Smirks at Info) The "psycho" scientist. Loud: YOUR A COMMUNIST AS WELL! WHAT A NUT! Mills: No, communism is just a red herring. Loud: HUH? Karaoke: Don't ask me. I don't understand it myself. Mills: Besides, I'm a capitalist. And I am going to sell your secrets to the highest bidder. Froggo: And what if we refused? Mills: Oh, you will...unless you want to be exposed. (To Karaoke) And I meant revealed! Karaoke: (angry) I know what you are talking about! Smartypants: I rather we revealed you! We can show you committed these murders with Molly's help. Mills: Ask yourself this. Will it help your reputation at the UN, Prof. Smartypants, if everyone knows you are not only involved in your affair with your patient, but in her death? Not to mention everyone else's murders as well! (Screaming maniacally) Smartypants: Oh yeah. (Froggo started toward her, but stopped when Mills pointed the gun at him.) Froggo: Besides, you can't blackmailed *me*, madam. I don't have any more money! Guests: Yeah! Mills: I don't want your stinking money. I only want your secrets. (Then point gun at Stalin) Except you. You have no government links what so ever. So I am afraid I can't let you live. Stalin: If so, you wouldn't point your gun at me. (Rimshot) Stalin: And beside, there is one secret that I know of. Mills: Which is...? Stalin: You may as well drop the act. There are no more bullets in that gun. Mills: Yes there is! I am not going to fall for that old trick! Stalin: Oh really? Mills: Yes! Stalin: Well, if I remember correctly, there were one shot for Tesla, two shots for the chandelier, two shots for the Lounge door, and one more for the girl. Mills: Wait a minute! That is not six! Stalin: One plus two plus two plus one. Loud: WHAT IS THIS?! MATH?! Mills: Shut up! Besides, one shot got the chandelier. So that makes it one plus two plus one plus one. Stalin: Even if you were right, that would be one plus one plus two plus one, not one plus TWO plus one plus one. (Mills thinks for a moment) Mills: Okay, one plus two...(pauses. Looks angry) shut up! One thing for sure! There is only one bullet left in this ****ing gun and guess who is going to ****ing get it! Karaoke: Young lady, watch the... (She is interrupted by a loud knock on the door. Mills looked over in confusion. It was enough time for Stalin to grab her. He grabs the gun so she wouldn't she use it anymore. Loud quickly ran for the door and open it. A bunch of cops that looked like Vikings ran in and search the mansion.) Froggo: (holding hands up) I am only a guest! Stalin: (still holding Mills) Where's the Chief? (He came in. It is the bible guy from before. Mrs. Karaoke looked shock.) Chief: An old coot, huh? Well good work Stalin. Stalin: Just doing what I thought was good. Chief: (to Mills) Well I was right. The end is near...for you, anyway. Mills: (nervously to Stalin) Now, Stalin. Please don't hate me for trying to kill you. Stalin: Who gives a care? Besides, like I said before, there are no more bullets left in this gun. And... (The gun in his hand suddenly went up and hit the chandelier. Stalin looks confused, while Mills is smiling, embarrassed) Stalin: Let see...one plus two, plus one... (Camera turns to Froggo) Froggo: Plus two, plus one is... (The chandelier crash behind Froggo, interrupting him.) The End? Not really! (Note from JusSonic: That what might have happened. But what about this?) (QC to Hall. Stalin turned the lights back on. He continued explaining.) Stalin: When the lights are off, the murderer ran to the Study, grab the Rope and Lead Pipe from the cupboard, ran to the Billiard Room, strangle Molly with the Rope (pretends to do so on Mrs. Info), go to the Library, and hit the Cop over the head with the Lead Pipe. When the murderer heard the doorbell rang, he or she took the gun from where Molly dropped it, open the front door, recognized the girl, and shot her. Then she ran back to the cellar! Everyone else: The cellar?! Stalin: Yes, the cellar. Karaoke: You are crazy. Froggo wasn't in the cellar nor is he a she. Stalin: Of course not. But you are. (Karaoke stared at him.) Karaoke: What? Stalin: You did it all. You killed everyone, except me and the others. Loud: THANKS GOODNESS! OTHERWISE, WE WOULDN'T BE STANDING TALKING ABOUT THIS! Stalin: (to Karaoke, ignoring Loud) You were missing when both the Cook and Tesla were killed. And the Cook? She was your cook! You made a mistake at dinner! Karaoke: What are you talking about?! Stalin: You told us at dinner that we are having one of your famous recipes. And monkey's brains, though popular in Cantonese cuisine, are not often to be found in Washington, D.C. Loud: THAT WHAT WE HAD EATEN?! Mills: Eew, Yuckosis! (Loud and Mills ran to the bathroom and threw up.) Karaoke: You are crazy! I mean, why would I killed all the others? Stalin: Safety measures. You are afraid Tesla will tell them about you. Smartypants: Uh, does this mean it has nothing to do with Info's disappearing scientist husband, Froggo's fusion bomb, and my contract with the UN? Stalin: Don't be ridiculous. Communism is a red herring. Loud: (coming back from the bathroom) HUH? Mills: (also coming back) I don't know. I don't understand those things myself. Stalin: Like I said, Karaoke did it all. Karaoke: (annoyed) You got no proof what so ever. Stalin: Oh really? Since the gun is missing, everyone empty their pockets and purses so we might find out who the murderer really is. (Everyone did so. Karaoke, however, pull out the gun and stop them.) Karaoke: Well, well, and I thought I was the only one being so predictable. Loud: YOU ARE THE KILLER? WHAT A NUT! Mills: Gypola! Karaoke: Yes I am. And what are you going to do about it? (She heads for the door, still pointing the gun at everyone.) Stalin: Oh nothing. Karaoke: (suspicious) What do you mean, "nothing"? Stalin: Like I said, nothing. But you did do one good thing. Loud: WHAT DO YOU MEAN? Stalin: Well, by killing off Tesla and his spies, she did everyone a good favor. Info: (sighs) Not the old "doing bad stuff while thinking they are doing the right thing" stuff. I thought Gene is the only one who always gets away with stuff like that. Loud: WILL YOU STOP MENTIONING HIS NAME?! Info: Sorry. Loud: AND ANYWAY, THE POLICE WILL BE HERE ANY MINUTE NOW! WHAT DO WE DO UNTIL THEN? Stalin: Why should we worry? No one call them. Karaoke: You mean...? Stalin: I only say that just to get you started. Smartypants: Bummer. Mills: Hey! You aren't Toast! Karaoke: If you don't shut up, I will make you Toast! Loud: BUT I AM NOT HUNGRY! (Rimshot) Stalin: I got a suggestion. Why don't we put the bodies in the cellar, locked it up, leave the mansion, and pretended this never happened? Agree? Karaoke: Fine...but I go first! Don't any of you try to follow me! (She waves the gun at everyone. They form a group.) Stalin: I think we should sing to show our thanks. (Start singing) "For she's a jolly good fellow, for she's a jolly good fellow . . ." (Everyone but Karaoke join in. Karaoke look disgust and left through the door. Everyone stop singing. They start to relax.) Loud: TOLD YA I DIDN'T DO IT! WHAT A BUNCH OF NUTS! Froggo: But now what? What will the cops do if they figured out? Stalin: Not to worry. The FBI will handle everything. Froggo: What? Stalin: You see, the call from Hoover is for me really. I worked for him. Smartypants: But you say you are a communist! Stalin: I am! But I am just starting in this butler's role. Mills: Like handling butts? (Laughing maniacally) (Rimshot) Stalin: (annoyed) I am getting tired of the jokesky. Froggo: I don't understand one thing. Info: Which is...? Froggo: Who is Karaoke taking bribes from? Stalin: Foreign power, of course. Her husband, who is the senator in case you have forgotten, had influence over defense contacts. Smartypants: Uh, any cover-up? Stalin: Now, what could be gained by exposure? Froggo: A complain letter from the censor. (Rimshot) Smartypants: Does the FBI cleaned up after a multiple murder? Stalin: Why else it is ran by a man named Hoover? Loud: SO FDR WILL TAKE OVER? (Rimshot) (QC to outside. Karaoke is just about to get into her car...when she is stop by the bible guy.) BG: Oh Mrs. Karaoke. (Karaoke turned around, confused.) Karaoke: How...how did you know who I am? BG: Well, the end is near...for you! (Points a gun at Karaoke. Lights turn on. Cops that looked like Vikings appeared. They pour into the yard.) BG: Take her away! (The cops grab Karaoke.) Karaoke: Hey! Let go! You will get letters for this! (They ignored and drag her away. The guests and Stalin ran out into the front yard to see this. It's obvious now that the BG is the Chief.) Chief: Well done, Stalin. We got her. Stalin: Well, there you have it. Like the Mounties, "We Always Get Our Man." Loud: MRS. KARAOKE IS A MAN?! I THOUGHT DENNIS RODMAN IS THE ONLY ONE PLAYING DRESSUP! Froggo: Shut up! (Both Froggo and Stalin kicked him. Note: This isn't Loud bashing, people!) Stalin: Well, who wants desert? Guests: I do! I do! The End? Not even close! (Note from JusSonic: Okay that was fun. But here's the real ending of the story.) (Stalin turns the lights back on.) Stalin: Sorry. I didn't want to scare you. Loud: TOO LATE FOR APOLOGIES! WHAT A NUT! Stalin: Well, while the lights were off, there was three more murders. All: (impatiently) Who did it?! (Stalin begins to stride away.) Stalin: We shall do it step-by-step! (To Smartypants) Prof. Smartypants, you knew Tesla was still alive didn't you?! Even doctors like you knew that! Since you missed shooting him in the dark, earlier, you pretend that he was dead so you plan to kill him later! And you did without us not looking! Mills: Hey! He is right! Smartypants wasn't in the Kitchen when the Cook was found dead! (Screaming insanely) Loud: WAIT A MINUTE! HE WAS WITH US IN THE BILLIARD ROOM WHEN WE HEARD MOLLY SCREAM! HOW CAN HE KILL THE COOK WITH US NOTICED! Smartypants: I didn't! Karaoke: You think we are dumb enough to believe that?! Stalin: You definitely are, Karaoke. Karaoke: (angry) What are you talking about? Stalin: You killed the Cook. Karaoke: What?! Stalin: She used to be your cook. You killed her because she told on you to Mr. Tesla. (QC to Dining Room as Stalin continued explaining, while sitting down in a chair. The guests stay near the door, while watching.) Stalin: Your mistake is that we are having one of you favorite recipes. (He stands up) And monkey's brains, though popular in Cantonese cuisine, are not often to be found in Washington, D.C. Mills: Eew, Yuckosis! Loud: WHAT A NUT! Karaoke: Well, you aren't the one who I killed! Stalin: So you admitted it! Karaoke: Yes, I kill her and she can rot in H**l for all I care. Info: Now who is speaking the language? (QC to Hall that everyone returned to. Stalint turns to Froggo.) Stalin: Froggo, while we were speaking to the Motorist at the door...(QC to flashback that Stalin is describing. Everyone was still in huddle in that flashback, except for some scenes.)...You took the key from my pocket, copy it, and put the copy in my pocket. You suggested that we all split up. Then, you left Ms. Mills, ran to the Study, unlock the cupboard, grab the Wrench, ran to the Conservatory, use the secret passage there to the Lounge, and killed your former employee, who is the Motorist! (QC to present Hall) Mills: Now I know why we were searching the Kitchen, even though earlier you said you were going to search it! Froggo: I got nothing to say. Stalin: But I do! (Stalin ran up the stairs grabbing Info while doing so. He let her go while climbing the stairs.) Info: What are you doing? You are crazy! Stalin: I am not the one on trial here! After we split up again, me and you, yes *you*, went back to the second floor! (He stops at the landing) While I was searching one of the bedrooms...(QC to a flashback where Mrs. Info is climbing down the steps. Stalin is describing this again.)...You went downstairs and turn off the lights. You took the rope from the cupboard from the Study and strangle Molly in the Billiard Room. (QC to present Hall again) Stalin: You were always jealous because she was having an affair with your husband, who you also killed! (Everyone, except Stalin and Info, gasp) Info: All right fine. I did it. I hated Molly so much that I all wanted to kill her, which I did. Stalin: You aren't the only one down here. Info: I am not? Stalin: Yes, while you were detained in the Billiard Room, (QC to flashback where Mills is now at work.) Mills decided to use this to her advantage, got the Lead Pipe from the cupboard, and killed the Cop in the Library, whom she been bribing! (QC to present Hall as Stalin confronted Mills) Stalin: Believe it or not? Mills: Believe! (Laughing maniacally) Who are you, Sherlock Holmes? Stalin: Not elementary. (Rimshot) Smartypants: I guess the only person left to kill the Telegram Girl was Mr. Loud. Loud: WHAT?! I DIDN'T DO IT! Froggo: Well there is no one else here. Loud: AS I SAID, I DIDN'T DO IT! LOOK, THE GUN IS STILL MISSING! WHOEVER GOT THE GUN, KILLED HER! (To everyone's shock, Stalin took out the gun.) Stalin: (smiling evilly) I shot her. Guests: You?! Stalin: Yes... Loud: I KNEW IT! I WAS GOING TO EXPOSE YOU, YOU KNOW! WHAT A NUT! Stalin: (to Loud) I also knew it. So I decided to expose myself. Karaoke: Sir, you can't do that! This is a Kids WB parody! Stalin: If so, there weren't be any murders at all, will it? Karaoke: (realizes) Uh, yes? (Stalin waves the gun at everyone. They now form a group.) Stalin: Well, you knew Tesla was dead. Ask yourself this: Did you knew who he really is? (Loud realizes) Loud: YOUR MR. TESLA! Stalin: Actually, I preferred Mr. Stalin. (He started to chuckle evilly) Smartypants: Wait! Who did I killed then?! Stalin: Well, duh. My butler. Smartypants: Oh, crud. Stalin: He was going to betray me by getting you all to kill me. But unforutnately for him, I got to you all, first. I am glad you all killed my spies. Now no one will prove that I was blackmailing you. (Laughing evilly) Info: You mean this all has nothing to do with our secrets? Stalin: Not really. Communism is just a red herring. Smartypants: Huh? Info: I don't know. I don't understand it all myself. (Stalin walked to the front door, still pointing the gun at everyone.) Loud: YOU ALL ARE NOT GOING TO GET AWAY WITH THIS! THE POLICE WILL BE HERE! Stalin: Oh please. No one call them. Karaoke: You mean...oh my gosh! Stalin: I only say that to kill you all started. (Smiled) So who say we couldn't get away with it? Now why don't we all put the corpses in the basement, leave one by one, and pretend that this never happened. (Loud pauses and look likes he is getting out something. Then he does something he didn't do all night.) Loud: (speaking normally) so you can still get away with blackmailing all of us? Stalin: (laughing) Of course! Why not? Loud: This! (Loud quickly grabs a gun from his pockets and quickly fires. Stalin tries to fire back, but was too slow. He is hit. The others look shocked now.) Stalin: (shocked) Good...oh good one, Loud. (He slowly slides down the closet door to the floor. He now looks at the...stuff on his chest.) Stalin: And a fatal one at that. (He closes his eyes for the last time. Loud lowers his gun, looking more confident than ever. Info slowly goes up to him, but was stop by his gun.) Info: What are you all? A cop? Loud: No, I am a plant. Mills: That will make you a fruit, right?! (Laughing maniacally) (Rimshot, except this time BFB is doing a raspberry.) Loud: Not funny. (Shows some sort of badge) FBI. Hoover wanted to call me. (He walks to the door. He turns around.) Loud: Told ya I didn't do it! (He opens the door. The cops, whom strangely looked like Vikings ran in, surrounded the guests. The Chief came in. It is the BG from before.) Chief: So who did it? (The guests begin to blame each other. The cops look confused. Loud shouted over the noise.) Loud: THEY ALL DID IT! (Speaking normal again) But if you must know who killed Mr. Stalin, I did in the Hall with the Revolver. (Chief smiles) Chief: Good work, Loud. Loud: Same here. Okay, take them away. (He goes for the door.) I am going home and sleep with my girlfriend! (Fade to black. We heard another noise.) Voice: Okay, and clear. (The lights turn back on. We see that the director is JusSonic.) JusSonic: That is a good fan-fiction if I said so myself! Another voice: Not really. (JusSonic turns. We now see the cast standing there looking annoy.) JusSonic: Well, you must admit. That is pretty good. Stalin: That is true, but did Loud really had to shoot me hard?! Loud: HEY, I AM ONLY DOING WHAT IS SAY IN THE CAST! WHAT A GROUCH! Bill Straitman: I can't believe you got Froggo to kill me! I mean he is only a little boy for crying out loud! Cho-Cho: Not to mention I only got one line in the movie! Pepper: This is totally bogus! Molly: You should at least get Joan to do the French maid. JusSonic: Well, you haven't got a decent part since H! Wars. Lydia: The problem is, you not only got me to kill someone, but you got me to swear as well! WOW: Your not only one not happy here, lady. JusSonic: Look, I am not going to turn this into another Pokejedservo. Movie over. I am going to rollthe credits now! (Everyone grumbling left, except for Loud) Loud: Hey, JusSonic. JusSonic: Yeah? Loud: Thanks for giving me a good part. JusSonic: Your welcome. Now go on to your girlfriend. Loud: Well, I better. She was kinda annoyed she isn't in this. JusSonic: This is the best I can do. Loud: WELL, SEE YA! (He left. JusSonic shrugs. FTB.) THE END? YOUR DANG STRAIGHT! Cast list 1.Nora Dunn: Mrs. Karaoke (Lydia Karaoke) 2.Tim Curry: Stalin the butler (Joseph Stalin) 3.Laraine Newman: Mrs. Info (Miss Information) 4.Rob Paulsen: Prof. Smartypants (Mr. Smartypants) 5.Cody Ruegger: Mr. Loud (Loud Kiddington) 6.Nathan Ruegger: Colonel Froggo (Froggo) 7.Tress MacNeille: Ms. Mills (Pepper Mills), Molly the maid (Molly Pitcher), Mrs. Tress the Cook (World's Oldest Woman), the Singing Telegram Girl (Cho-Cho) 8.Jeff Glen Bennett: Mr. Tesla (Nikola Tesla) 9.James Wickline: Bill Straitman (The Motorist) 10.Bill Henderson: The Cop (Martin Luther King Jr.) 11.Frank Welker: The Bible Guy/The Chief (Father Time) With special guest appearance by: JusSonic: Himself |
